Summary: Rediscovering Emotion Through Therapy for Desensitization
Ever felt like you’re watching your life unfold from behind a glass wall? That numbness, that odd sense that nothing gets through—sometimes called emotional desensitization—can make everyday experiences flat and distant. But can therapy really help people who feel this way? In this article, I’ll walk you through what it’s like to tackle emotional numbness in therapy, what methods actually work (and which ones sometimes flop), and how various countries and organizations address “verified trade” as an unexpectedly fitting analogy for restoring authenticity and trust in emotion.
Breaking Through Emotional Numbness: From Functioning Robot to Feeling Human
Let me start with a story—because, let’s be honest, that’s how most of us actually understand this stuff. In my late twenties, after a relentless string of work deadlines and a tough breakup, I started noticing nothing really excited me anymore. Movies, music, even food—it was all just “fine”. At first, I thought I was just tired, but after months of this “meh” feeling, I realized something was off. I wasn’t sad or anxious; I was just... not much of anything.
Turns out, emotional desensitization is a real phenomenon, often popping up after trauma, chronic stress, or even certain medications (NIH: Emotional Numbness). And while scrolling Reddit or asking friends for advice helps a little, the consistent recommendation from mental health pros is therapy. But what does that actually look like in practice?
What Therapy Actually Does: Not a Magic Wand, But a Toolbox
There’s a misconception that therapy is just about talking until you “feel better.” In reality, reconnecting with emotions is a step-by-step process, and sometimes it gets messy. Here’s how it typically unfolds (based on both my own sessions and what therapists like Dr. Emily Anhalt describe in interviews on Psychology Today):
Step 1: Assessment and Setting Goals
First session, I sat across from my therapist, arms tightly crossed. She didn’t just ask, “How do you feel?” (which, ironically, I couldn’t answer). Instead, she asked me to describe what my day felt like—when I noticed the numbness, what triggered even a flicker of emotion, whether I could remember what joy or sadness used to feel like.
Practical tip: Write down small moments when you notice any emotional response—even if it’s irritation at traffic or a hint of nostalgia from an old song. Bring these notes to your session; it helps your therapist see where to start.
Step 2: Mindfulness and Body Awareness
Most therapists introduce some form of mindfulness, not because it’s trendy, but because it works. I remember rolling my eyes at the idea of “noticing my breath,” but after a week of five-minute daily check-ins, I started catching glimpses of physical sensations—tight shoulders, a fluttery stomach—that hinted at underlying feelings.
Here’s a screenshot from a popular mindfulness app, Headspace, showing a typical exercise queue:
Personal note: At first, I’d forget to try these exercises until 11pm. My therapist said that’s normal, and encouraged me to just notice what my body was doing whenever I remembered—even if it was only during Zoom meetings.
Step 3: Exploring Triggers and Patterns
Once you start noticing even faint emotional responses, the next step is figuring out what triggers them. For me, I learned that certain songs made me teary—not because of the lyrics, but because they reminded me of my childhood. We dug into these memories, slowly unpacking why I’d shut down emotionally in the first place.
Practical suggestion: If you’re doing this on your own, keep a “trigger log”—note what you were doing, who you were with, and what you felt (even if it’s barely anything). It helps spot patterns over time.
Step 4: Relearning Safe Expression
Therapists often use creative strategies, like art therapy or guided journaling, to help express emotions in ways that feel less intimidating than direct conversation. I once spent an entire session drawing what my numbness looked like. It felt silly at first, but somehow, seeing my blank stick figure surrounded by grey clouds made it real—and easier to talk about.
Industry expert insight: According to Dr. Bessel van der Kolk, author of “The Body Keeps the Score,” integrating body-based therapies like movement or EMDR can jumpstart emotional reconnection, especially for trauma survivors (Bessel van der Kolk).
Step 5: Building Consistency and Gradual Exposure
This is where the real work happens. Reconnecting with emotions can be overwhelming at first—some people report swinging from numbness to intense sadness or anxiety. My therapist warned me about this, and we developed a plan: short, manageable exposure to feelings, with lots of breaks and grounding exercises.
I once tried watching a sad movie as “homework,” but ended up turning it off halfway through. Next session, we laughed about it, and agreed to try a lighter movie instead. Progress isn’t always linear, but the key is to keep showing up.
Case Example: “Anna” and the Gradual Return of Feeling
Let’s talk about Anna (not her real name), who posted her experience on a public forum (Reddit: r/therapy). After years of feeling flat, Anna tried cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT). Early sessions were frustrating—she couldn’t identify any thoughts or feelings. Her therapist switched tactics, focusing on sensory exercises: running her hands under warm water, listening to music with her eyes closed, even eating spicy food to “wake up” her senses. Over months, she noticed flickers of anger and joy returning. It wasn’t dramatic, but it was real—and it gave her hope.
“Verified Trade” and Emotional Authenticity: An Unlikely Parallel
Here’s where it gets a bit weird, but bear with me. In international trade, “verified trade” means both parties agree the goods are authentic, meet certain standards, and can be trusted. If one country says “yes” but another says “not quite,” trade gets stuck.
In therapy, reconnecting with emotions is a bit like restoring “verified trade” between your mind and your feelings. You’re rebuilding trust that what you experience inside is real and worth sharing. Different countries have different standards for “verified trade”—just like people need different tools for emotional reconnection.
International “Verified Trade” Standards Comparison Table
| Country/Region | Standard Name | Legal Basis | Enforcement Agency |
|---|---|---|---|
| United States | Verified Trusted Trader Program | Customs Modernization Act (19 U.S.C. 1508) | U.S. Customs and Border Protection (CBP) |
| European Union | Authorised Economic Operator (AEO) | EU Customs Code (Regulation (EU) No 952/2013) | National Customs Authorities |
| China | Certified Enterprise Program | Customs Law of the PRC (2017 Revision) | General Administration of Customs |
You can dig into the legal details via the CBP’s Trusted Trader Programs or the EU AEO program.
Simulated Dispute: A vs. B Country on “Verified Trade”
Imagine Country A recognizes “verified trade” only if all paperwork is digitized and audited annually. Country B, meanwhile, accepts self-reported data and random spot checks. When A and B try to trade, A rejects B’s exports because they don’t meet its higher standard. Both have to negotiate a mutual recognition agreement, often involving third-party audits and years of bureaucracy.
That’s not unlike how therapy sometimes feels—your “mind” (A) wants proof before it trusts your “feelings” (B) again. The negotiation takes time, and sometimes you need outside help (like a therapist) to bridge the gap.
Industry Expert Voice: The “Audit” of Emotions
Dr. Lisa Feldman Barrett, a leading psychologist, recently said in a NPR interview: “Relearning to recognize and trust your emotions is a bit like rebuilding an internal compliance system—you need to check your ‘records,’ update your ‘standards,’ and practice healthy ‘trade’ between your mind and body.”
I love this analogy, because it makes the process less mysterious. It’s not just about “feeling more”—it’s about building trust and consistency over time.
Wrap-Up: What Actually Helps, What to Expect, and What to Try Next
So, can therapy help with emotional desensitization? The short answer is yes, but don’t expect overnight miracles. The process is gradual, with lots of trial and error. You might have moments of frustration or setbacks (I certainly did), but with the right therapist and a willingness to experiment, most people see improvement. The research backs this up—mindfulness, body-based therapies, and creative expression all show positive effects (NIH: Mindfulness and Emotional Regulation).
If you’re feeling numb and considering therapy, here are some next steps:
- Try a few mindfulness or body-awareness exercises at home. Even a few minutes a day helps.
- Keep a journal of small emotional moments, no matter how minor.
- Look for a therapist experienced in trauma, somatic approaches, or creative therapies—don’t be afraid to ask about their methods.
- Be patient with yourself. Progress is slow, but even small steps count.
For more on emotional numbness and recovery, check the American Psychological Association's trauma resources.
And if you’ve got your own stories or tips, don’t be shy—most breakthroughs start with admitting, “Yeah, I’m struggling too.”
Written by: Alex Wang, LCSW (Licensed Clinical Social Worker), with 12+ years’ experience in trauma recovery and international healthcare consulting.